Saturday, February 19, 2011

The Power of Delicates

You know, this whole "laundry" deal can be a very long process.

This is why it is not a chore that I am extremely fond of.
However, I do enjoy clean clothes so I am forced carry out the laundry ordeal on a weekly basis. --Sometimes on a two-weekly basis, if I hadn't had the time and have still had some clean underwear in the drawer to live off of (underwear often decides when my laundry days will be).

This is usually how these days go:

1) Walk into bedroom to get dressed.

2) Open and peer into "delicates" drawer.

3) Notice that all of the comfy ones are gone, and all that are left are the undies that I typically avoid wearing (usually due to anti-wedgie purposes).

4) Look around room and spot laundry basket.

5) Which is overflowing with dirty clothes.

6) Sigh.

7) Grab rejected pair of delicates and get dressed.

8) Sigh.

9) Lug overflowing basket of dirty laundry down the hall and into the living room while pulling at wedgies.

10) Dump out monstrous basket onto floor.

11) Sort out into piles of "darks", "whites", and "colors."

12) Debate about weather it is okay to put the "whites" with the "colors" because the "whites" pile is so small.

13) Feel frustrated because "whites" are supposed to be bleached, but putting them in their own load will be a waste of water. It also means an extra load of laundry to wait for.

14) Decide that is reason enough to throw the two together.

15) Toss in these two piles into the washer, add soap and fabric softener.

16) Push a few buttons, begin.

17) Get a few chores done, or just sit around and watch TV while clothes are washing.

18) Hear timer go off.

19) Ignore it.

20) Continue to watch TV and ignore timer.

21) After interest has been lost in TV program, load dryer and put "darks" in washer.

22) Push a few buttons, begin.

23) Pull out laptop and surf the net.

24) Hear timer.

25) Ignore it.

26) Continue surfing the net as you ignore timer.

27) Eventually get annoyed at constantly nagging timer, and go get dry clothes.

28) Dump clean, warm clothes on couch.

29) Go put dark load into the dryer.

30) Come back into living room to see dirty dogs burrowing into freshly clean, warm clothes.

31) Yell at dogs to get off clothes.

32) Yell at dogs to get off clothes.

33) Go back to net surfing.

34) Hear timer.

35) Get bored of net surfing so go out and get dried clothes.

36) Dump warm, clean clothes onto previous pile of warm, clean clothes.

37) Go on with day and do various activities.

38) Upon arriving home, collapse on couch and watch "What Would You Do?" on TV. Next to piles of clean clothes.

39) Listen to mom nag  Hear mom request that I fold clothes.

40) Fold clothes.

41) Finish watching "What Would You Do?"

42) Take a shower.

43) Go into living room and grab clean underwear and pajamas.

44) Go to bed.

45) Wake up the next morning.

46) Go into living room.

47) Yell at dogs to get off folded clothes.

48) Yell at dogs to get off folded clothes.

49) Remove one stubborn dog off of folded clothes.

50) Go make oatmeal.

51) Get frustrated with oatmeal because it wasn't noticeable that this was a different kind of oatmeal (Steal oats), and it takes 30 minutes to make.

52) Almost burn oatmeal.

53) Have mom take over.

54) Puts freshly made oatmeal into bowl and enjoys on couch. Next to folded clothes.

55) Takes a few bites of oatmeal and feels overwhelmingly full.

56) Wraps up oatmeal and puts in the refrigerator.

57) Decides to bring folded clothes into bedroom.

58) Sets each pile onto bed.

59) Goes on with day.

60) Night time comes, and it is time to go to bed.

61) It is much too late to stay up and put away clothes.

62) Put clothes onto floor.

63) Go to bed.

64) Wake up for school.

65) Get out of bed and trip over folded clothes on floor. --Unfolding them.

66) This lasts for a couple of days.

67) By this time, the clean clothes and dirty clothes on the floor become indistinguishable.

68) Try to remember which clothes were clean.

69) Put those away.

70) Throw all the rest into laundry basket into an overflowing pile.

71) Sigh.


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